Ewan: Anyone out there got a pet?
Only a few select people are actually party to the fact that I do, in fact, live cheek by jowl with an fluffy animal creature.
His name is Mr Foofoo, and he is a grey/white netherland lop. Which means he is a bunny. And he is definitely a he. He is fully intact and keen to demonstrate his boy bunny credentials whenever an opportunity should arise. But he is forgiven. He sleeps in the garden at night, in his predator-proof Foofy-house. He goes by many names, of which Mr Foofoo is but one...

Foofster
Herr Foofs
The Foofer
Foofoolicky
Rufus Foofus
Il Fooferinio
Foofaloo
Foofi Wan Kenobi
Mr Noofs
The Foofer Noofer
Foofinder Gee
etc...

This actual Noofer, and all other bunsters of his specie, are not rodents but lagomorphs, apparently close relatives of the horse. Yet my Foofs is the posessor of an intellect that way exceeds the reasoning capacity of the average equine bonce. He wasn't born yesterday, and he knows what side his bread is buttered on. He is after all a London bunny, so he has aquired a certain level of street sense which may keep him out of trouble when the shit hits the fan. He even knows the difference between a dog and a fox. Which is a lesson I can't seem to learn...